Recently, I was working with a client who has a tendency to overreact and move into drama when dealing with a particular co-worker. As you know, this serves only to aggravate the individual and those around them. We lose sight of the real situation and clarity. When we respond emotionally, we create an environment that quickly escalates into greater drama and conflict.

I worked with this individual to first become conscious and aware of when they begin to move into this “drama” space. Upon realizing they are moving into this, I then suggested they take a moment. Allow the attention to move to their breath. In that, they will likely notice some disturbance or movement in the body and some associated, non specific emotion. Maybe the fists are clenched and anger is there or there is a pit in the stomach and fear is there. By taking a brief moment to allow this internal attention, the body has a tendency to settle down and therefor, the emotion does as well. At this point, one is more focused in the present moment and can begin to move, decide, act, or think about the circumstances more dispassionately and intelligently.

In doing this exercise, my client realized that she was irrationally intimidated by this co-worker and any interaction stirred up her own self doubts and insecurities. As soon as she got this, she was able to drop the irrational reaction and proceed with greater calm and conviction.

In this example, the simple act of taking a moment to allow one’s awareness to focus on the breath and thereby the body,  can calm the emotional state and create a space where clearer and more appropriate decisions can be made.  This simple technique brings the awareness to the present, now moment where we are most powerful, alert and effective.

It went like this:

Mike: I don’t understand belief.

Dad: What don’t you understand?

Mike: Why do we need it?

Dad: Because it’s part of life.

Mike: But Dad, if we know something, we know it, right?

Dad: Yes.

Mike: And if we don’t know something, we don’t know it, right?

Dad: Uh-huh.

Mike: And if we are not comfortable with not knowing, then we make something up and call it a belief, right?

Dad: Right.

Mike: Well, why don’t we just say what we know, not say what we don’t know, and save ourselves the trouble of having to create belief?

In his youthful innocence, my son had stumbled on an obvious fact: Most of the content in the human mind functions as a buffer for a large group of sensitive egos who simply can’t tolerate not knowing. My son had clearly seen that the emperor had no clothes.

In the previous post we teased out the difference between concept and experience. We pointed out that leaders today many times have lost the ability to distinguish between the two. In fact, we concluded that the map is a conglomeration of our concepts and that experience is the land of leadership upon which we are all required to walk. If concepts create our map then belief becomes the mountains that cannot be scaled and the oceans that cannot be penetrated. Belief is the enshrining of locations on our map that make them more dense than their very nature. Belief is the crystallization of concept. Much like when we travel to our favorite destinations, our beliefs become like the Golden Gate Bridge or the Empire State Building. We can’t help ourselves but to return to our favorite belief sites again and again.

But think about this for a moment. If leadership requires the space in experience for you to respond and arise in that specific defining moment, then the loving embrace of our long-held beliefs may very well keep us from that leadership moment. When humans engage in the addiction of belief it tends to accentuate the believer to the detriment of the followers. True leadership is not in the act of one man, but in the act of that man as properly situated within the whole of humanity- never losing touch with that totality.

So I want you to consider the possibility that your long cherished beliefs may block the very essence of who you are and the response of the leader that you hope to be. Can you suspend belief and stand in the unknown and unmarked place that all great leaders embrace?

Now what does this have to do with Peter Drucker?

Many years ago while pursuing my masters degree in philosophy at Claremont Graduate School, I had the opportunity to occasionally wander in and speak with Peter Drucker. Because I was well known in the M&A world at the time, Peter had met me at various functions in Southern California. He was highly interested in my sense that the ancient seekers journey to awakening was the same as the path to adult maturity, which he saw being developed in leadership theory. I never expected that the themes from our conversations would still live within his legacy. But that is not the case as the article brought back the memories of our conversations.

Here is what the article said!

“Jeremy Hunter, who teaches at the Peter F. Drucker and Masatoshi Ito Graduate School of Management at Claremont Graduate University outside Los Angeles, believes mindfulness should be at the center of business schools’ teaching. That, he argues, is because it is about improving the quality of attention, and in the modern workplace, attention is the key to productivity.” (from the article)

Thank you Peter

I am grateful that Peter’s encouragement was one of the strong motivations in producing my book Awakened Leadership : Beyond Self-Mastery. You see neither one of us was sure that the corporate universe would be available to borrow understanding from thousands of years of experience. That kind of knowledge was not considered mainstream. If Peter were here today I would gleefully call him and say “We really were on to something way back when!”

The whole essence of coaching and indeed leadership, is to utilize concepts as pointers to a real experience. The stories that we all share about leadership are simply a window on the world that really demands our participation. If we confuse looking through the window with executing on the ground that our leadership will be incredibly diluted. Why is that? The reason is concepts that are utilized as pointers to experience should originate in that experience itself. That is to say that if I am a leader with experience I should be able to look into my own sense of experience. And from that deliver a concept that operates as a pointer for those whom I lead. However, the opposite is not true. When leaders simply learn concepts and then deliver those as though concepts are executable on the ground, typically the results reflect a lack of leadership.

Remember the allegory of the cave as told to us by Plato. He postulated that certain men in the cave whose backs were to a fire would extract the entirety of their knowledge from the shadows that the fire created on the wall they watched. This would be rather than looking at the actual subject matter of experience. So if one of those wall-watchers were your leader you would be depending on their cognition of the shadows they interpreted. I don’t know about you but that doesn’t fill me with confidence.

As leaders we must stand in our own experience and find a way to sweep those around us to the obvious response. When we distribute well worn concepts, the energetic sense that calls others to follow simply isn’t there. How does it get there? It comes through the dedication of leaders to their own maturation. In that process they will rediscover the distinction between concept and experience.

So my question to you is : Are you doing the work necessary to recapture this distinction  for those who follow you?

What arises for me in this drama is how our Ego identity engages us in the natural but tiring rise and fall of life’s experiences. Good things come and go. Great accomplishments come and go. Bad things come and go. Tragedies come and go. Clearly, the emphasis here is Come and Go. All life’s experiences arise and fall. They are not permanent. Rule drove to great heights, fell to a great low, and now struggles to arrive once again at a great height. The challenge of this natural flow is the identification with the highs and lows. When we are on the high, we want it to last as long as possible. When we are on a low, we yearn for the past High. It’s exhausting when you think about it. I suspect that all of us can relate to this in some way, shape or form.

If one is not attached or identified with an outcome whether it be great athletic performance or great business accomplishment, there is a relaxation into this natural flow of life’s experience. You can be present to what ever arises with out the burden of outcome. This does not mean being passive. Just the opposite. When one moves through life unattached to the outcome, you are fully present, passionate and focused on what presents itself. Whatever gifts you posses naturally display themselves.

Identification is a trap set by the Ego; a trap that reinforces the Ego’s sense of control and desire for uniqueness. The truth of the matter is that you are much more than the Ego. In the depth of your Self, there is a Silence from which all life’s experience arises. There is no need to carve out uniqueness. It arises on its own. Act from that Silent place. Be a witness to life’s ever changing scenery. Notice when ego arises. Notice when identification arises. Move fully into life unattached to outcome and see  what happens. We’ll talk more about Leadership and Silence in the future. How does this sit with you? Let me know.

Hi, I’m Alan Shelton, the author of Awakened Leadership: Beyond Self Mastery. The purpose of this first writing on Awakened Leadership is to begin the leadership conversation.

Over the many years, in both the corporate and now the global digital world, leadership technique and method has been delivered to” leaders in waiting” as a stream of consciousness. That is to say that the various principles and concepts parading as leadership have no common foundation. The message of my book Awakened Leadership is very simple. We as leaders cannot expand our leadership presence beyond our own unseen reactive characteristics. Period. Now this may seem obvious to the majority of readers, but as you read those things that claim to improve your leadership, note whether this foundational characteristic is present. You will find great suggestions and incredible insights that would be helpful if only you could bring them on board.

Over the years many have asked me why it is that we see the obvious process of personal maturation overlooked. My response is that the work of personal development, including the recognition of our own unseen reactive characteristics, is hard work. It is simply much easier to teach a possibility that can never be reached, rather than convince a leader that hard work dedicated to their own personal awakening is necessary.

In order to make this all clear there are a variety of fundamental definitions including belief, ego, conditioning, and even unconsciousness itself that must be understood. I have isolated what I feel are the 8 basic building blocks upon which all leadership must be understood. These building blocks are all personal in nature and will require courage of each” leader to be” to apply their own ruthlessness to themselves. I will write a blog entry over the next 8 weeks illuminating one at a time each of these concepts.

So let me hear from you. Do you think leadership can be developed in a state of personal unconsciousness? Do you think there are crutches or devices that allow one to avoid the process of personal maturity? Or do you think there are systems and techniques wholly outside the need for personal work that allow for great leadership? These questions and any others I invite you to take on. And in the weeks to come we will build the conceptual” yellow brick road” that will reveal the path to Awakened Leadership.

Sustainable culture change requires three things. The first is a clear vision of the kind of culture that is both desired and needed to move forward. The second is process design, what new systems will best support the envisioned culture. The third, and hardest, is focus on creative leadership that models and supports the desired culture.

Creative leadership is the hardest because it requires individual leaders to reflect on how they show up, what is working and what needs to change in their leadership behavior. You can not change a culture unless you take a deep, possibly humbling, look into your own leadership effectiveness. Typically, this starts with Sr. Leadership and if sustained, trickles on down the line. The key word here is Sustained. Culture change can not be sustained without involving the whole company. Sr Leadership has a huge impact on the corporate culture but the line clearly matters as well. To fully embrace culture change, the line must have its voice and participation in the process. Inviting all leaders and line managers to engage in some level of team and individual self reflection as well as new process design nurtures buy in, sustainability, passion and success. Done well, the inward reflection shifts the consciousness of the individuals to an appreciation of what they each bring as parts of a vibrant culture change. What wants to happen, happens waiting for the next emerging change.

It was the spring of 1969. I had graduated from the University of North Carolina the previous summer. My work life had taken a downturn. I was involved in a failed clothing manufacturing business that a group of us had started. Looking for something else to do, I started working and subsequently running a drug crisis intervention center. During this time, a friend gave me a cross with the Star of David in the center. I was not a religious person but thought this was so cool looking that I wore it everywhere. There was something oddly but wonderfully rebellious about a good jewish boy from Newton, Ma wearing a catholic symbol imbedded with a six sided star. This cross was tiny, only 1/2 inch high but it hung outside my shirt like some fancy status symbol. Lord knows what status (pun intended)! Everyone I worked with was familiar with this piece of jewelry.

One day, I was walking on campus near C court, one of the speaker halls. I noticed that the center of the courtyard had been graffitied with colored chalk. Back then, the early ‘70s, graffiti was commonly used for pranks as well as social commentary.  As I approached, I saw that the graffiti was of my cross with the Star of David. Written above it in very large letters was ‘BOB IS THE MESSIAH’. Obviously, my friends were playing a practical joke. They knew this was one of my daily routes. Looking down on the graffiti, my hand went to cover up the cross so no one would ID me as complicit in this deed. I shoved the cross down my shirt. As I did this, I noticed a sign on the building directly lined up with the top of the cross. On the open door, it read “Silence is the basis of activity. Get deep rest and release stress.” Given my failing business and long hours at the clinic, the words ‘deep rest’ jumped out at me. I got curious. It turned out to  be an ad for Transcendental Meditation (TM). A lecture was about to start. Without thinking, I sat in. And, thus began my lifelong search for the essential truth of who I AM.

After many years of meditation and self inquiry matched with an equal number of years in business, that essential truth is consciously manifesting in all aspects of my life. So, what does this have to do with Leadership? Not much except that events have a way of unfolding unexpected results. Allowing events to unfold, as they arise, may steer your business activity in new, rewarding and long lived directions.

I have been in business for most of my adult life. Concurrent with that has been a dedication to uncovering the limits of self awareness as a means to some enlightened end. My journey is not particularly special. As a matter of fact, it has been quite ordinary. And it is in that ordinariness that I have begun to uncover some essential truths of life, living and being in business. The first is that if you think you have done anything, get over it. I make this observation as a point of fact and as a point of practical, managerial application. We tend to see our lives as a culmination of actions that we have taken. The question is who is the actor? Have I really created this or that; or was the impulse there and I merely taped a thought to it. Physics tells us that impulses arise before the thinking mind identifies with the impulse. That suggest that life is being lived at every moment and that our personal ego, in it’s urge to survive as a unique identity, grabs onto the impulse with a thought that somehow serves it and makes it special. Have you ever asked yourself how things ever get done in business? How is it that with all the multiplicity of personality, ego and circumstance things get organized for a particular result? Is it real to say that our systems created the container for the results to happen? Or, was the happening already in motion and we just appeared to be the source of it? If one accepts that life and business is somehow being lived in the moment, what is our role? This acceptance requires a big leap to the diminishing of ‘Free Will’. Our role becomes merely the expression of the divine play of light (intelligence) and energy.

Shakespeare said ” All the World’s a Stage”. Can one consider this as a real option and still live a fulfilling and purposeful life? If one thinks of oneself as the Doer, then no. One will always be drawn to the pleasure and pain of life as we see it from that perspective. If, however, one recognizes the essential unity of all things and accepts the unique role one plays as organized and managed by that unity, life becomes completely fulfilling.

Ask your self ” Who Am I”. “Who is asking the Questions?” Ramana Maharshi, a great turn of the century Indian Sage,  proposed this as a means to focus on the truth of life. Begin to ask your self these questions and see what shows up. You may find that the identification of ‘Doership’ softens. The perception of Me the Business Leader transforms to The Business Leader being lived. Drop the me and all the turmoil, fear, envy, jealousy, need for success, bravado, etc, fade into the background. They do not disappear as these emotions and coexistent opposites are the natural play of a dual world. But, internally, established in the unity of all things, one becomes the observer. One feels the fluctuations of life as waves rising and falling on the silence of the depths of the ocean. The surface is ever changing but the depth is timeless and changeless.

Fortune is the result of an organizing consciousness far superior to anything we can imagine. So, how does one behave if truly steeped in this unified awareness? How does one appear to meet the responsibilities of life and leadership? Just do what you have always done. Be how you have always been. Act in concert with the moral, social, environmental structures that you have been already. Just act with the knowing that you are not that Doer. All this doing is happening in you, not by you. See all of life as being lived in you at every moment. And, feel how there is a relaxation and increasing comfort with all of life.

Yesterday as I passed again Mike, the hotdog man, rushed out to tell me his latest stories. It seems that a young Mexican man who had lost both of his arms in a childhood farm accident came to the US every year to visit his family. His custom was to always buy one of Mike’s hot dogs and then take the $2 ride to see his family. Yesterday he didn’t have money for either the hotdog or the ride. And Mike took great pleasure in making sure that he got one of our $4 hotdog packages and $2 for a train ride. About an hour later a fellow who lives nearby in a group home came to see Mike. It turns out that he saves every nickel and dime that he can find and about every 2 to 3 weeks he musters enough to get a hotdog from Mike. And yesterday as he walked by to say “hi” Mike told him that Santa had a surprise. And Mike had the pleasure of giving a hot dog to this man and watching the tears of gratitude flow down his face.

Now I’m no great scholar of math, but even I can do the calculation that says that $8 bought two of the most priceless gifts that anyone could have received. So my gift to every one of you this year is the feeling that we all can have by responding to the spontaneous love that arises within each of us. Perhaps if Jesus were here today he would tell us all” Go forth and buy a hotdog for someone you love. And remember you don’t even have to to know who they are”

Merry Christmas to one and all

With much love

Alan Shelton